The Power of Anger: A Healthy Emotion Advocating for Change
Anger gets a bad reputation. It’s often seen as something to suppress, manage, or avoid. Many of us grew up in environments where anger was unpredictable, overwhelming, or even dangerous. Maybe we witnessed explosive outbursts, or perhaps we were on the receiving end of someone else’s unprocessed rage. Over time, we learned to associate anger with harm—something to fear, something to silence. But what if anger isn’t the problem? What if anger is actually advocating for us?
Anger is a Primary Emotion, Not a Problem
Anger isn’t just a reaction—it’s a primary emotion hardwired into our nervous system. Like sadness or joy, anger has a purpose. It arises when something important to us is being threatened—our boundaries, our values, or even our sense of justice. It’s a signal that something needs to change.
When we suppress anger, we suppress an essential part of ourselves. Ignoring it doesn’t make it disappear; it just forces it underground, where it can manifest as resentment, exhaustion, passive-aggressiveness, or even chronic stress.
Why We Learn to Suppress Anger
For many, anger became unsafe because of how we received it in childhood. If caregivers or authority figures expressed anger in destructive ways—through yelling, punishment, or emotional withdrawal—we may have internalized the belief that anger is inherently harmful. In response, we learned to shut down our own anger to maintain peace or avoid rejection.
But here’s the truth: anger itself isn’t the problem—how we express it is. When anger is ignored or denied, it doesn’t vanish; it festers, showing up in ways that may feel disconnected from its original purpose.
Anger is an Advocate, Not an Enemy
Think of anger as a powerful advocate for change. It’s the emotion that pushes people to speak up, set boundaries, and demand fairness. It’s the force behind movements for social justice, the spark that fuels personal growth, and the energy that drives transformation. When we learn to listen to anger rather than fear it, we can harness its power in a way that is productive, rather than destructive.
Some ways anger advocates for us:
It identifies unmet needs – If anger arises, it’s likely pointing to a value that’s being ignored or a need that isn’t being met.
It signals boundary violations – Anger often shows up when someone crosses a line we may not have even realized we had.
It provides energy for change – Unlike sadness or despair, anger is activating. It moves us toward action.
How to Work With Anger Instead of Suppressing It
1. Recognize Anger as Information
Instead of judging anger as bad or wrong, get curious about it. Ask yourself: What is this anger trying to tell me? What is not working in my life?
2. Feel Anger in the Body
Anger isn’t just a thought—it’s a sensation. Do your muscles tense? Does your chest feel hot? Bringing awareness to the physical experience of anger helps process it in a way that prevents it from turning into long-term stress or resentment.
3. Express It in a Healthy Way
Anger doesn’t need to be loud to be powerful. Try movement-based practices like punching a pillow, shaking your arms, or vocalizing frustration in a safe space. Writing, painting, or making music can also be incredible ways to channel the energy of anger without suppressing it.
4. Use It as a Guide for Boundaries
If you feel angry often in a specific relationship or situation, it may be time to set (or reinforce) boundaries. Anger can show you where you need to advocate for yourself.
Anger is Here to Help You
Rather than seeing anger as something to fix, we can begin to see it as something to listen to. When acknowledged and expressed constructively, anger becomes a guiding force that empowers, protects, and energizes.
Through Somatic Therapy, you can learn to work with anger instead of against it, allowing your body to release stored tension and reclaim anger as a source of strength rather than shame. If you’re curious about how this process can support you, Somatic Therapy in New York City offers a space to explore anger in a safe and empowering way.
Anger is not the enemy. It’s the fire that clears the way for something better.
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The Power of Touch in Somatic Therapy: Co-Regulation and Heightened Awareness
Touch is one of the most fundamental human experiences. From the moment we are born, we rely on physical contact to feel safe, connected, and attuned to the world around us. In Somatic Therapy, touch is not just a tool for relaxation—it’s a pathway to deeper awareness, emotional regulation, and healing. Through co-regulation and the activation of the felt sense, therapeutic touch helps individuals reconnect with themselves in a profound way.
What is Co-Regulation?
Co-regulation is the process by which our nervous systems attune to one another. It’s why a baby calms when held by a caregiver or why we feel soothed by the presence of a loved one. In Somatic Therapy, co-regulation through touch allows the nervous system to shift from a heightened state of stress or dissociation into a more grounded and connected state.
When a trained somatic therapist uses intentional, non-invasive touch, the client’s autonomic nervous system (ANS) responds by mirroring that regulated presence. This helps:
Reduce chronic stress and anxiety.
Cultivate a sense of safety in the body.
Rebuild trust in physical sensation and interpersonal connection.
Many people who have experienced trauma or prolonged stress develop a dysregulated nervous system, making it difficult to move between states of activation and rest. Therapeutic touch provides a bridge, allowing the body to experience what a regulated, safe presence feels like in real-time.
The Role of the Felt Sense in Healing
The felt sense is the body's way of communicating internal experiences beyond words. It’s the subtle awareness of bodily sensations, emotions, and intuitions that often go unnoticed in our fast-paced, cognitively driven world. Touch in somatic therapy enhances the felt sense, allowing clients to:
Become aware of where tension or emotion is stored in the body.
Develop a deeper connection to internal cues, rather than relying solely on thoughts.
Shift from dissociation into embodied presence.
By gently placing attention on sensation, a client learns to trust their body’s signals, rather than override or ignore them. This fosters greater self-awareness and emotional processing in ways that words alone cannot achieve.
How Somatic Touch Supports Emotional Processing
Unlike traditional talk therapy, which engages the mind’s ability to analyze experiences, somatic touch engages the body’s ability to process them. This can be especially beneficial for those who:
Feel stuck in patterns of overthinking or emotional numbness.
Struggle with trust, intimacy, or connection due to past trauma.
Experience chronic tension, pain, or nervous system dysregulation.
Through safe, intentional touch, the therapist supports the client in tracking shifts in sensation, guiding them toward a felt sense of relief, safety, and integration. These subtle but profound bodily changes allow emotions to move through the system, rather than remain trapped in tension or reactivity.
Touch as a Pathway to Embodied Healing
In a world that often prioritizes mental processing over bodily experience, reconnecting with touch as a healing modality can be revolutionary. Through co-regulation and heightened sensory awareness, somatic touch therapy offers a direct, non-verbal way to access healing, presence, and trust in one’s own body.
If you’re curious about how touch-based somatic therapy could support your healing journey, Somatic Therapy in New York City offers a safe space to explore co-regulation, nervous system balance, and deeper embodiment. Healing doesn’t have to happen in isolation—your body already holds the wisdom, and with the right support, it can learn to feel safe again.